Beyond That Point

So many people frightened.

I know. People I haven't talked to in years are calling.

... Oh ... wow.

I don't mind, but they don't listen. Breaks my heart.

...

What? Didn't you think I cared?

Yes, of course. I just hadn't thought of it from that perspective.

No one does.

I'm sorry. Are you complaining?

What? No! Of course not. I'm so happy to hear from them. I wish they'd call more often. And perhaps before it's too late.

Is it too late?

For some, yes. For many more in the coming days.

I've been concerned.

You've been terrified. 

Well, maybe a little.

No. A lot. But for you, that's nothing new.

Oh. Wow.

Hmm, yeah. 

I am trying to do better, for Sarah's sake. But the situation is so dangerous for me.

For you, every situation is dire.

Uh...

Close your mouth. Listen, you're always worried about something. And a suppressed immune system is something to be concerned about, particularly when viruses abound. Durning a pandemic, I completely understand. 

I sense a 'but'.

But you tell me you trust me. 

I do!

With what?

Why with ... with ... everything!

And if you get this virus?

I don't want to get this virus! I'm trying to stay isolated and sterilize everything possible.

But what if you get the virus?

I don't know. I have people relying on me. I can't think about that because I ...

Because you don't know what to do if it happens. You have no contingency plan. 

No.

And neither does anyone else. No one prepared for this day. The panic set in because no one ever believed the entire population could become ill in a matter of weeks. The idea most of the world could perish in a matter of days is incomprehensible to humanity. And yet it has happened before. You people never learn from the past.

I know. I studied the past for 5 years!

Ah. But with that knowledge, you still don't trust me.

I try. Very hard.

I know. Enough?

... I don't know. I hope so.

You're painfully honest. 

People don't like it. Not good if you want friends.

We're friends. I find it refreshing. 

I do trust you. It isn't the destination I fear; I fear the journey.

So, what is the post really about?

Don't I trust you?

I think you do up to a point. It is beyond that point that you can't see and that frightens you far more than this virus.

What do I do?

You'll never see beyond that point, blinded by fear. It isn't your trust that is the problem.

Oh ... It's my fear.

These talks are just the best, aren't they?

#ConversationsWithHim