A Normal Day

Its been an interesting day.

How so?

I can't explain it. I've felt almost normal. 

Every day is normal. You can't judge the day by circumstances.

I have no idea what that means.

So, what's different about today?

Well, I don't have a lot of pain. I mean, virtually none. For a while now. I woke up with mild discomfort but it passed off. I'm thankful for that. It has been cloudy all day and finally rained. We went to Louisville to get my son from the airport. It was actually a good trip, despite heavy cloud cover. I read all the way there and most of the way back. About half way home, we put in a Credence Clearwater Revival cd in. I love CCR. Mike and I sang.

So, isn't that normal?

Not that. I mean how it feels. Except on the way back I felt alone. 

But you weren't alone. Both sons and Sarah were with you.

See, I know this. I looked out over the fields and the forest that lay along the highway and there was just this sense of isolation and emptiness and huge sadness.

Maybe it was just because of the large space. 

I really don't think so. That's never going to stop, is it?

You can't judge your circumstances by one day. Everything changes. That's normal.

This may sound crazy but it is very strange when I actually feel good.

Why is that crazy?

That isn't normal. It should be the other way around. It should be strange when I feel bad. But it isn't. When I feel good, I feel weird. 

Whatsoever a man thinks in his heart, so is he.... Proverbs 23:7

So... I think it feels weird and it becomes weird? 

You've felt bad for so long that you've become convinced that is normal.  If you think something long enough, you'll eventually become it. 

If I think I'm rich .....

Stop that. "Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things." Philippians 4:8

Yeah, that's what I've been doing. "The right hand of the Lord is exalted: the right hand of the Lord doeth valiantly.  I shall not die, but live, and declare the works of the Lord. The Lord hath chastened me sore: but he hath not given me over unto death. Open to me the gates of righteousness: I will go into them, and I will praise the Lord:" Psalms 118: 16-19


It's a start. 

You know, this blog thing . . . I'm not sure I'm doing it right. 

Why?

It isn't working the way I intended. 

I know. 

#ConversationsWithHim